Made with Love: What a Flat Anniversary Cake Taught Me About True Value

Discover how overcoming low self esteem can transform your relationships. Learn why the most priceless gifts in life only cost a little time and love.

Written 15th November 2024

I've never really been lucky in love.

It used to all be about me. My low self esteem always reared its ugly head and I became needy. And that ruined them all.

But after another heartbreak of the highest order a few years ago I took a step back and looked hard at myself and what I was doing wrong. How could I be a better partner? More giving instead of taking?

Thankfully the time I spent disecting previous relationships and working out what would make a successful relationship for me paid off, and I've just celebrated my first year with my new partner. He is a wonderful man. I could not have imagined a person like him existed, he is perfect for me and we make a great team. We both agree that had we met in our earlier lives, we wouldn't have been who we are now and it probably wouldn't have worked out. I'm now so glad all my previous relationships didn't work out, those partners weren't that wonderful. But love is blind, and thankfully time heals everything.

I decided to make an anniversary cake. Coffee. Because we both like it.

Now, I'm the first to admit I'm not a very good cook and rarely bake because I try not to eat sweet stuff. But he has a massive sweet tooth so I knew a cake would be a good idea.

I spent ages trying to find an easy recipe. Got the ingredients at the supermarket and used up others I already had. I melted chocolate and some eclairs down to make decorative hearts. I made it all by hand as I don't have any electrical tools for this. I made a mess everywhere. It took me hours with prep and baking and washing up afterwards. I was so looking forward to surprising him with it and had imagined what it would look and taste like for days. This beautiful, lovely, moist coffee cake.

It didn't rise. Almost flat as a pancake.

I didn’t put enough coffee in, so tasted like, well, nothing.

I was so disappointed.

So I cheated and made it look like it should by stuffing out the middle with cream, and sitting the whole thing on top of an upside down cake tin.  Now that's a LOT of cream!

It probably cost about £6 to make in ingredients and just my time and electric for the oven and hot water to wash up.

But it was made with love.

£6 to make. The look on my partners face, priceless.