Christmas is in the shops. Hold onto your wallet
Written 7th November 2024
Yesterday I went to Asda. There it was, front and centre in the foyer... big and sparkly....CHRISTMAS has arrived!!
It's still seven weeks away but the mince pies are out, the tubs of chocolates are slap bang in your face next to the fruit and veg, so you can just pop one in your trolley now (probably eaten before December 1st, but what the heck, you can buy another tub right? It's only £5 or whatever). The drinks aisle is stocked with all the Christmas versions of booze you rarely ever drink, but just in case someone visits who drinks it, I'd better buy some Bailey's or Advocaat or whatever...
Stuffing is taking pride of place on an aisle end and there's a whole aisle of smellies. Smellies for gardeners, for Dads, for Mums, for girls who like pink, or for 'the man in your life'. Just pop a couple of those in the trolley, that'll be a great stocking filler, or for the postman or your next door neighbour.
Christmas, love it or hate it, but it is expensive. New clothes for work parties or family gatherings, extra nibbles because we're hungrier from November 1st to January 2nd for some reason and need to eat more treats than we usually do. I'm not bah humbug I promise you. I'm just not a fan of Christmas any more, purely because I think we've lost the ability to really appreciate what the whole darn thing is supposed to represent. Instead it has become a marketing dream for companies making money on our need to fit in and be the best / have the prettiest tree (or at least one that coordinates with your new grey lounge colour pallet), have the most wonderful nibbles, biggest turkey, fattest stocking, give the bestest gifts. I could go on and on about why we all get suckered into this frenzied spending phenomenon. But Christmas, isn't it supposed to be about being grateful and thankful for your friends and family? Why does that mean it has to cost so much?
Why can't friends and family know you love and care for them with just a card telling them that? Maybe taking the time to write a personal message instead of just 'and a happy new year. Love Me'. Or making the effort to see them more during the year?
I'm not for one second saying don't do Christmas. Don't get merry. Hell, yes get merry, there aren't enough Friday and Saturdays in the year so yes, chill, relax, enjoy. But what I'm suggesting is that you don't have to be paying off the cost of the whole event for a year afterwards (until the following November usually funnily enough). Why can't a small gift be good enough? When did just getting someone socks, or gloves, or just a satsuma (that one's a joke) not be enough? Understand this is all about marketing. Big business making money. Convincing you that you need to be on this bandwagon and well, if you aren't, you're a mean person, a sad person, a Scrooge.
Really, aren't you just making companies rich spending your cash on things that you think people will like because you like shopping / spending money? (we get a brain thrill in the form of a hit of the brain chemical Dopamine when we spend on nice things by the way) and these companies know that. We love spending. If nothing else why not give someone a tenner and tell them to buy something in the sales? They'll get more bang for their buck, and get something they actually want or need. Why can't it be simple anymore? Stress-free instead of stressful? Why don't we spend more time with these loved ones the rest of the year? And just show them that we care through love and kindness towards them all the time?
Ask yourself this, everything you gave as a gift last year, have you seen it being worn or used? Same about the lovely gifts you received... do you use it? Or is it in a cupboard gathering dust? Or been added to the store of gifts you're going to re-gift? (RE-GIFT: giving a gift you received to someone else because you didn't like it or won't use it).
I give my son cash now he's older, every year. Maybe a silly little gift to unwrap but I'd rather he gets what he wants, not because I'm lazy and hate shopping (which I absolutely do) but because I don't know what he wants or needs. One year when he was young I spent £100 or so on him for Christmas and his favourite toy?... The Pound Shop big plastic robot toy. £1... (I actually went mad and bought him 2). I don't think he played with hardly anything else I got him that year. He loved the things. Cool. My son has cheap taste like me 🤣. My point is, it's not about the cost, it's about getting something that's going to give pleasure to the person who is receiving it no matter how small or inexpensive it is. Why can't gifts be cheaper? Why do we need to go into debt or cutback on other things just to do it? Why aren't we able to just buy gifts we can actually afford to give?
When I was young my siblings and I used to get £100 each for Christmas. I thought that was a lot of money back then (early 1980s) and I mean that would fill a pillowcase with gifts. Even now to me, because I'm an old bird, £100 sounds like a lot. It is a lot to the people in other countries who make all the stuff we buy. It's not even a pair of trainers these days and doesn't buy much, it's a weeks shopping if you're lucky. People in our country wont even get out of bed for less than that a day. But what is wrong with just doing a Secret Santa? Just buying a few thoughtful gifts? Setting a limit (our family has £20). What's wrong with not going crazy, getting into debt, with money being really tight in January and just get a couple of pressies for the real important people in your life? Spend your hard earned cash on a nice holiday? Or paying for your car tax in one go instead of monthly and save the few quid extra you pay for the privilege of the credit?
What? Car tax? We're talking about Christmas aren't we? Yes and No. I'm rambling about why it's ok to go mad at Christmas but we don't feel the need to save up in the preceding 11 months to pay for it. It's not like it's a surprise... it's every single year, 25th December, regular as clockwork.
Try it. In January, set up a savings pot in your bank and put away however much you think you'll spend next Christmas divided by 11, and save for it. When you see appropriate gifts in the shops during the year, at a reasonable price, not inflated Christmas price, buy it. Put it in a cupboard until it's needed. Keep a list of what you've bought for who. Buy your wrapping paper in the January sales and your Christmas cards for next year. You'll save a few pounds on the cost of the whole event. What's wrong with buying reduced stuff? Nothing as far as I'm concerned and have been doing it for years. I even started a spreadsheet specifically to record the money I saved from buying reduced items, things on special offer etc. just because I was curious to see how much of a difference it made to my outgoings. All my friends know about my spreadsheet. They all think I'm mad too.
Final thoughts.
Do people like or love you more based on the material things you have and the things you give them?
How much debt and savings do you have?
Do you ever lay in bed worrying about money?
Change the way you see this glorious season. Appreciate the stunning autumn colours and go for a wellie walk with the kids, your partner, your friends. Volunteer to help at the Samaritans on Christmas day (yes, I do do this as my son always spent Christmas with his Dad). Why not put your money to bettering others who need help and give the money to save a whale/donkey/homeless person? Rather than mindlessly being on the Christmas spending roller coaster (who isn't stressed out by the time Christmas actually arrives?) and just making big companies richer. I mean seriously richer, billions... Don't you ever want to pay down your mortgage and retire in relative comfort? Small cutbacks add up to big wins in the long term.
I'm Lady Frugal. I'm a self confessed tight arse, never been given a penny (except for some money towards my wedding which was used as a deposit for my first home), I'm 52, have paid off my mortgage and no longer need to work to pay my bills. I'll share my mindset towards money and spending and simple techniques to save a few quid here and there, because the old saying really is true. If you watch the pennies....
